Parenting is a challenging job, especially with these new-gen kids. Moms are well educated and minimum have a degree but they struggle to understand parenting. If you are a Zen mom, you might have ended up hearing this term called GENTLE PARENTING. If not, please hear it now. It is a completely new style of parenting where we thought that punishments, rewards, yelling, and hitting will only help the children to be disciplined. It’s completely wrong, as I have said this is new to some people but if you analyze it deeply, then the impact and logic will be clear to follow.
Before getting into this, from my experience I feel it’s different and difficult to follow. People will blame you for this kind of upbringing as involves only respect and love towards your kid even when they throw tantrums and be mischievous.
Why Gentle Parenting?
In my journey of motherhood, I am really bad at controlling my emotions. So, when I hit my kid, she hits me back or hitting others which is not agreeable. That is when I thought that I should reduce hitting her or stop it.
The bond with your child is lifelong and everyone wants their kids to be successful and well behaved. It starts at home and you are the first friend and a teacher. They observe you every day with your behavior. Even if they are scared to hit you back, it may be reflected on other kids in school. Be careful what you teach and do to them.
• You can have a great connection with your child
• Raise a responsible and meaningful kid
• Think twice before they act
How to follow gentle parenting?
It is not simple as said but a journey of learning for you and the kid. You cannot turn to be a calm and composed mom in one night. Practice makes you perfect.
• Give choice
Understand the situation, where you have lost your control. Make them realize that you are not able to control your anger. Admit your mistakes and apologies. For instance, if your child asks your permission to play in the water, give them the reason for your NO and offer their favorite toy to play with.
• Respect your child
Treat your child as equal and allow them to learn. Do you want your kid to say thank you and sorry? Do not force them. Instead, you say whenever needed. They will eventually understand the situation and start to use those words.
• Teach their emotions
Teach them that if they are crying and asking for snacks, tell them that you are feeling hungry that is the reason you are fussy. In situations when they return from playtime, toddlers do not sleep easily. Calm them by teaching their feelings like tired, sleepy, and hungry and do whatever they want.
Meltdowns are common and you cannot avoid it at any age. In such cases, pacify them with a hug, and let them cry. One cannot cry for long, my kid will usually find something that pacifies her and just offer in limits like their favorite toy, snack, drink, or anything.
Sometimes the situations can turn to be worse than usual like playing with switchboards, gas stoves, medicines. At those dangerous zones make them it is strictly a BIG NO. Act at the moment and make them understand about the consequences later.
• Calm yourself down
No one can control the emotions so easily. It is important for the mother to not act at the moment. The child might have asked for some simple thing but because of your work and mood swing, you might have yelled at her. During that time, you should calm yourself down by taking a deep breath, stop your work, and listen, ignore your negative block. Pause for a minute to get into the grounds. Move away from that space if you are in an uncontrollable state.
Treat your child as an adult not in their teens but from an early age. Be a friendly, calm, and lovely mom to your kids. Just try to put yourself in their will you be happy after a hit and scolding to eat a plate of rice. Also, not only rewards and gifts will work to discipline the kids. They are meant for short term goals but in the longer-term kids should understand the impact. They are way matured than we think.
BE CALM AND LIVE A PEACEFUL LIFE WITH YOUR KID